Meditative creation

I have the urge to write about all the aspects of what I might term, my extensive doodling hobby, that I greatly enjoy. I occasionally doodled throughout my life, but the hobby took up new importance after graduating from college. Being constantly bogged down with never-ending work can really limit your activities. It did so for me, because every activity that was not part of the “work load” only made me feel guilty of wasting time, so those extracurricular interests were hard for me to develop in myself. This is just one aspect of being finished with school (for now) that I am greatly appreciating at this time. It's freeing to be able to develop new and different aspects of myself, abilities and interests.

I began my extensive doodling career with just a pen or pencil on paper. My artistic ambitions grow through phases of different mediums, techniques, and/or styles. From my pen/pencil art, I began to experiment more with colored pencils on paper. Then, I moved to markers, sharpies to be specific. I began experimenting with paints, acrylic and tempera. Initially, I started painting cardboard boxes, figuring that these kinds of things could only be improved. I have since taken to the tendency of painting... well, everything. I paint boxes, clocks, tables, sticks, shelves, chairs, jugs, cups, really anything I can get my hands on. If I ever own a house, I can guarantee that with enough time, the entire house will be covered, inside and out.

I have also gone through phases of painting with fabric paint on clothing. And I enjoy creating other things like earrings, outdoor structures and delicious, creative foods. The process of creation is an essential part of my life. It is an outlet that provides something to me.

I am currently working on one of my largest, and so far my favorite painting yet (among other projects). It's just a large board I found in the trash. Each stroke brings a new element to consider. The intent behind each stroke varies. Sometimes, I visualize clearly my next move, other times I go onwards with only a vague idea of what my hand is about to do. I spend a lot of time looking at my work. It's a fascinating process that has no backwards and forwards. It is only in the present. There is no error. Every “error” becomes part of the new picture. It may take me away from my first image of what was to be, but this never distresses me. It only enhances. It is part of the essential process.

Creation brings me to the present. I cannot conceive of the end to anything I am making. I look only at what is and usually think only as far as my next immediate move. Sometimes I do sit for a while, looking and imagining further possibilities in the drawing or painting, where I want to go with it. But as I work and create each new stroke, the picture itself changes and is therefore never predictable. Something about this unplanned, unpredictable, organic-feeling process is extremely calming and centering. I believe it is a meditative process. Creating almost always has the power to erase negative thoughts or cyclical thinking patterns I may be experiencing. As I said, it is in the present and brings me to the present. I honestly believe that my experiences with “extensive doodling” have given a new depth to my life and changed me in a very positive way.